Before you unplug or disconnect…

To help you maintain a positive attitude that is so necessary to be happy, healthy, and succeed in any area of life, it is very commonly  advocated that you

  1. stop listening to the news,  ignore what is going on in the world, and to
  2. disconnect with the ‘negative people’ in your life.

What’s wrong with that?

1. Mankind’s very survival has depended upon paying attention. So has the existence of democracy and freedom.

Fail to take prompt, prudent, appropriate action, and you lose it. Better advice would be to be discerning in one’s news sources. As journalist Naomi Wolf has recently said, it is “crazy” not to check out what the media is saying because so much of it is propaganda, or ‘spin’. World events are sometimes ‘theatre, spectacle’ — false flag events put on deliberately to sway public opinion, to control and manipulate, and to receive approval for political response. See

She says that there is practically no real journalism happening anymore. News sources are not checked to see if accurate before reporting, so some have been blatantly false. Also, not mentioned by her but true is that almost all of American news sources (t.v., radio, newspapers) are owned by only 6 people. This limits the viewpoints expressed, and causes the very same ‘news’ scripts to be read on multiple channels. So it is important to look for accurate, trustworthy news sources that can alert you to developments that are important to support or snuff out. Then turn off the rest.

2. What you do not see, you cannot address, so the situation continues to fester and deteriorate.

I dare you to ‘think positive’ about the ’empty tank’ fuel gage on your car, or to the leak dripping from the ceiling. Not paying attention to it does not make the problem go away. While it is not easy to do so, it is important to

  • Be AWARE, even VERY AWARE, yet have PERSPECTIVE,
  • Take POSITIVE ACTION without losing HOPE,
  • Find a place of BALANCE.

Environment that includes the thoughts and feelings of others, does have a powerful effect upon us. Stress and overwhelm is over the top. It seems that one way to control the negativity in our environment might be to cut off contact or dismiss those in our life who are depressed, upset or otherwise ‘negative’. But there is a price to pay for this.

3. You cannot write off anyone without losing some humanity within yourself.

Currently, scientists talk about a theory of Entanglement–the idea that everything and everyone is connected. Therefore each impacts upon the other. Ho’oponopono, an old Hawaiian practice, talks about each person’s responsibility in causing/contributing to another person’s behavior or illness. Christians are told “you are your brother’s keeper”, “love one another”, “do unto others as you would have them do unto you.” Other religions also emphasize compassion, kindness and charity.

And yet, in the real world we understand that there are limits to our time, finances, mental and emotional energy we can expend on being compassionate, listening to or helping others. Where is the balance?

Rather than write off a person that frequently complains, or is frustrated, angry or depressed, there is a way to show compassion, love and accept people where they are, and help them to shift their focus from problem to solution, and help yourself at the same time.

You can accomplish this through

  • just listening,
  • trying to understand what they are saying/feeling and why,
  • acknowledging their feelings whether or not you agree with them,
  • affirming your belief in their ability to meet their challenge ,
  • and if it is true, just letting them know that you love/care about them
    • “I’m so sorry you are going through this, but I want you to know I ____ (love you, believe in you, feel you are going to get through this).”
  • If you don’t have the time or the inclination to listen and try to understand, then at least acknowledge their upset, and affirm a basic ability that exists within everyone to figure things out eventually (with or without help).
    • I can tell you are really ___ (upset, depressed, etc.) about this. But I am ___ (unable to help you with it ___  because ___ (I am leaving right now, about to ___, don’t have any quick answers to help you with it). Nonetheless, I believe you have greater resources within yourself to bring into solving this problem. And I believe you are going to find the appropriate help you need to resolve it just as you have with other problems you have had in your life. I bet that you are probably a lot more capable and resourceful than you are giving yourself credit for right now. And if you think about other things you solved that you never thought you could, that awareness will help you now.

Use ordinary conversation to shift the mood of yourself and others

  • Ask them a question that moves to possibility:
    • If it could work, how would it work?
    • If you could ___, what is something, no matter how small, that you could do right now? 
  • Ask a question that reminds them of other tough times they got through
    • Can you remember another time in your life when things looked bleak, but which you got through? (If they respond ‘yes’, then say) Tell me about it.
    • Has your car ever broken down? Did you get it fixed or just get another form of transportation? And did you solve that problem because it became a priority, and because it became a priority, you figured out a way to solve it? So if you make this problem of ___ a priority, can we assume that it is only a matter of time that you figure it out just like the other priorities in your life?
  • Ask them a question that shifts how they look at it
    • Who do you know that would look at this situation/problem differently? That might not be beaten down by it? That might not even be as upset or upset at all? What would they think that would allow them to have the same experience but not suffer nearly as much? 
    • If you were to pretend that you were ___, how would you go about resolving this issue?
    • How can you look at this situation so that it doesn’t bother you nearly as much?
  • Remind them of their resources to meet the challenge
    • family, friends, their network, skills, talents, internal strengths
  • Remind them of other positive things going on
  • Give them an image of themselves as more intelligent, capable, resourceful than they are projecting at the moment.
    • You know, right now you are giving me the impression that you think this problem is bigger than you are. But I don’t believe it. I think that this problem is going to force you to grow and is going to bring to the fore greater abilities and resourcefulness within yourself than you ever thought that you had. 

I look for and help others to see resources within themselves. You can do the same. And when you do, you will find that you have greater resources within yourself!

Copyright by Roxanne Louise. However, this article may be shared in free online sources only if this copyright notice and link to and  are included with the content.



Weight Loss Facts Everyone Should Know

  • Are you confused by conflicting weight loss programs?

  • Have you tried all the diets that instead of reducing your bottom adds only to the bottom line of the weight-loss gurus and manufacturers of the products that they hawk?

  • Have weight loss programs been too rigid or stressful–too much work for too little return?

There is no clear consensus among experts. Worse yet, they may offer opposite advice–eat mostly fruit and vegetables and grains, which are carbs, versus eat very little (Low Carbohydrate Diet), eat a low fat, low protein diet versus eat a high protein/fat one (Atkins), eat a high fat, low carbs (Keto), follow intermittent fasting, or….

Is the confusion making you crazy? Surely, if the experts disagree, how do figure out what is going to work for you even if some programs work for some people, some of the time?

#1. No one dietary or exercise program works for all.

Eat for your body type?

The evidence is that no one program works for everyone although there are various good ones that work for many. Body or blood typing may be a reason why. Ayurvedic Medicine brought to Western attention by Deepak Chopra in Perfect Health says that there are ten possible body types, each that require its own dietary plan and exercise program for maximum health and weight loss. Ayurveda determines the body type by a constellation of personality traits, and this can be obtained by a self-scoring questionnaire.

Eat for Your Blood Type?

But Dr. Peter D’Adamo in Eat Right for Your Type claims that blood type (O, A, B and AB) is what determines which dietary and exercise plan is necessary. He argues that our ancestors adapted over eons by eating their own specific diets. This adaptation to or lack of exposure to specific foods is what determines which are digestible or not, act like medicine or poison to the body, speed up or slow down the metabolism, compromise or assist in the production of insulin, create or upset or hormonal balance, and promote health or create problems such as water retention, thyroid disorders, ulcers, and more. In other words, by eating the foods that are right for your type, you improve your overall heath, of which one side benefit is weight loss.

#2. When you eat the foods that are right for you, for whatever reason makes it right, not only do you feel better, but that good feeling translates into being more active and, consequently, trimmer and healthier.

#3. Weight loss is a do-it-yourself project. 

With so many vastly different approaches, I believe that each person must do his own research, prudent self-experimentation on a “canʼt hurt” basis, and observe the results. Start with the obvious. Use your common sense! Let improvement in overall health and vitality be your guide.

#4. Start with the obvious & go on from there.

Ed Victor, author of The Obvious Diet, claims that most people already know why they are fat and what they need to do about it. He advises that each person come up with his own program rather than follow someone elseʼs because the rules you make up yourself are the ones you are more likely to stick to. Can you think of one thing which if you did on a regular difference would make a positive difference for you?

#5. Weight loss is first and foremost about improving overall health.

Weight loss and management is about loving and honoring yourself and reflecting that in how you take care of yourself. It is a side effect of greater health, and requires establishing a lifestyle of good eating, exercise and lifestyle habits (including adequate sleep, fun, and stress reduction) that are maintained long-term most of the time. Amplify every system of the body so that it is functionally optimally.

#6. Enhance Digestion

Live foods, enzymes, herbs and spices assist digestion. What doesn’t get digested, doesn’t get absorbed. This leads to cravings.

Consider food combinations.

Harvey Diamond in Fit for Life is claims that foods that utilize incompatible enzymes for digestion (i.e., fruits and anything else, or meat and starch) end up putrefying in your body, causing improper absorption of nutrients, fatigue and toxicity leading to disease and weight gain.

The Role of Elimination, Circulation, Respiration, Lymphatic System, & Muscles

Improve elimination with drinking lots of water, and, possibly doing a colon, liver, or gall bladder cleanse. Enhance circulation with exercise, dietary changes, herbs, or specific therapies. Enhance respiration with deep breathing, laughter, vigorous movement, and increased oxygen. Oxygen burns fat, reduces stress, and raises endorphins (your bodyʼs natural pain killers and feel-good chemicals). Build muscle because muscle burns fat. Enhance the lymph system with exercise or lymph drainage massage. Most importantly, get the toxins out of your body.

#7. Toxicity is a major consideration

Kevin Trudeau in his updated Natural Cures “They” Donʼt Want You to Know About says that most fat people have

  • low metabolism caused by problems with the thyroid, pancreas, liver, stomach, small and large intestines, or colon
  • under active thyroid, which can be caused by fluoride
  • improper functioning pancreas, which can be caused by food additives, and refined sugar and white flour
  • clogged and sluggish liver, which can be caused by medications, cholesterol reducing drugs, chloride, fluoride, food additives, refined sugar and white flour, artificial sweeteners, monosodium glutamate (MSG), and preservatives
  • sluggish digestive system, which can be caused by insufficient digestive enzymes possibly from food additives, candida yeast overgrowth, or toxicity
  • toxicity caused by medications, chemical residues in food, food additives, chlorine, fluoride, and insufficient exercise
  • hormonal imbalances, which can be caused by toxicity or lack of walking, and are highly toxic in general. (Toxicity causes you to retain water and increase fat storage.)
  • large appetite caused by improper assimilation of food from inadequate digestive enzymes, candida yeast overgrowth, or food additives
  • eat when they are not hungry because of habit, stress, emotional eating, or physiological food cravings. (Physiological food cravings can be caused by toxins or candida yeast overgrowth.)
  • eat larger portions than thin people because of larger appetite, inability to assimilate nutrients, physiological cravings, emotional issues, stress, and habit
  • consume more “Diet Food”, which are loaded with artificial sweeteners, sugar or chemical additives that make you fat and are addictive.
  • eat shortly before bed. (Late eaten food is turned into fat storage instead of metabolized.)
  • are adversely affected by growth hormones in meat and dairy products
  • think of themselves as fat–a self-fulfilling prophecy.

#8. Parasites, hypoglycemia, and allergies also cause cravings and overweight.

Two- thirds of all obese people have a sugar addiction characterized by craving for sugar.

#9. If you crave it, you are either allergic or missing some vital nutrient contained in that food!

People with a sugar addiction are conditioned to burn sugar not fat for energy. After the addiction is gone, the insulin level stabilizes and the person begins to burn fat instead. The sweetness in both sweetened and artificially sweetened drinks and foods tend to stimulate the appetite. People who consume them gain more weight than those who donʼt.

However, if you are craving a healthy food such as spinach, butternut squash, or fish, you may need the nutrients in that food.

Here is the test:

Do you feel better or worse one hour after eating that craved food? If you have more energy and are thinking more clearly, then it was needed. But if you are tired, sluggish, then you should limit or avoid that food in future.

#10. People overeat because they donʼt feel good.

Anything, physical or emotional, that causes you to not feel good, can cause weight gain, either directly, or because it creates a disinclination for physical activity, and a tendency to reach for fattening foods. Unfortunately, when you donʼt feel good, you may gravitate to alcohol or the quick-fix energy of fat, sugar, white flour, and caffeine. A weight loss program needs to address not just what and how but also why you eat.

#11. Anything that causes stress can trigger overeating. Anger and guilt head the list.

Even with the possible physical causes, most people are fat because of emotional eating and stress. Eating can be an addiction, and most people who are overweight by 50 pounds have a real psychological need that food is providing. Stress management and healing emotional wounds should be included in any comprehensive weight loss program. Unless you deal with the emotional or psychological reasons why you eat, any victories against the scale will be temporary.

#12. Donʼt blame your genes!

It is your eating, exercise and lifestyle habits, and stress – not your genes – that make you fat. While some people are born with a slower metabolism, learned behavior is more important than genealogy in obesity. What food habits were you taught? Did your family use food to reward or to show love, or to avoid confrontation and intimacy? Did your family use food to fill an emotional void, to comfort, to dull pain or boredom? Using food to satisfy emotional needs can get you into big trouble. Identifying with fat friends or relatives can also cause unconscious behaviors that duplicate their weighty results.

#13. Low calorie or highly restricted diets backfire!

The best way to gain weight is to go on low calorie diet! What your body loses is not fat but lean muscle tissue and water. Long term, low calorie diets are a form of starvation. Your body knows this, and becomes a very efficient fat-conservation machine in response. Low calorie diets and long term fasting can lead to a large insulin reaction that can block fat from leaving. It slows metabolism down dramatically to between 25-40%. This slower metabolism continues until up to a year after you have regained all the previously lost weight. After several weeks of a formula diet when you start eating again, your body may absorb fat by 300-400% above normal.

The more you diet, the heavier you get.

If you have been on many diets, your metabolism may never readjust unless you undertake a vigorous exercise program. Exercise is the best way to speed up the metabolism, but hypnotic or auto suggestions also work, as do certain herbs. Whereas, artificial sweeteners or corn syrup and certain foods can slow down metabolism.

#14. Allow for some amount of “cheating”.

A long-term weight loss program should be flexible enough to include some occasional or small deviations from your program. For example, a small portion of whatever you want on an occasional basis so that you donʼt feel deprived and self-sabotage. Instead of buying a bag of cookies and then being tempted to eat through it in just a few days, buy one when you are out for your weekly shopping. Perhaps you want to save that special treat when you go out with others. For example, share a desert. The important thing is cheat outside of the house, and not to bring home those snack items that you would devour in no time.

#15. Start with Food Substitution

While it is common sense to lower the overall calorie consumption, it may not be necessary to reduce the overall volume of food (you can eat a lot of watermelon and lose weight). Food substitution is an easy way to start making changes without starving yourself.

What works for many people is to substitute fresh fruits and vegetables and lots of water, herbal tea, soup for anything that would cause you to binge. Increase the portions of non-processed fruit and vegetables and reduce the portions of fatty meat, cheese, etc. And most importantly, substitute food made from scratch from non-GMO foods for anything that is processed.

16. Make it easy or you won’t keep it going.

If your food plan is not easy, you won’t make it a lifelong practice. Make sure that you have quality food that you can grab readily available in the house, or when you go out if you go past mealtime. One way to do this is to cook your dinner in bulk, package some for tomorrow’s lunch, and freeze additional portions. Then you have only to move out of the freezer (or move down to the main part of the fridge) a few hours before to defrost for a quick meal. Avoid microwaving to do this as microwaved food also is toxic.

16. Pay now for good quality food or pay doctors later for poor health.

Substitute food that is organic from food that is not.  Almost all corn and soy is GMO (genetically modified), but the list of GMO foods is growing. Do some research. GMO foods are toxic because your body does not know how to process them, and toxicity is linked to weight gain. High fructose corn syrup, aspartame, and MSG (now known by many other names–google) is known to cause weight gain, so avoid it completely. Read the labels. 

17. Exercise is important, but not all exercise is equal.

Lean people move more. Sustained, repetitive movements like walking, jogging, cycling, and running burn fat. But quick, spurt exercise like baseball and basketball burn carbohydrates. The earlier in the day that you exercise, the greater your overall resting metabolic rate for the rest of the day. There is a 40-60% increase in fat burn if you exercise in the morning as opposed to the afternoon or evening.

18. Deal with what’s eating you.

This is where I come in as I specialize in helping people resolve mental and emotional issues, and then teaching them how to do it for themselves. There are lots of simple stress management tools and techniques that are easy to learn and quick to do. These include self-hypnosis, the Emotional Freedom Technique, Glass of Water Technique, Walking Mantras (both outlined in my book Your Unlimited Potential, a complete self-hypnosis course), affirmations, the Infinite Intelligence Process (as outlined in my book Accessing More — Tapping into the Eternal, Unlimited Self with the Infinite Intelligence Process), and a host of other strategies outllined in another book of mine, Releasing Anger without Killing Anyone. 

19. Stopping smoking need not cause weight gain!

One-third of people who stop smoking lose weight because they feel so much better that they no longer avoid activity. One-third of people who stop smoking stay exactly the same. One-third of people who stop smoking gain an average of 5-6 pounds, which is usually gone in one year as the metabolism readjusts. Only 10% gain as much as 30 pounds. These are people who are simply switching addictions. They are probably eating to fill some psychological need. A good hypnosis stop smoking program can address those needs. Weight gain from quitting can be headed off with a simple plan to exercise, drink more water, and eat fresh fruits and vegetables, and practicing stress management tools.

#20. Create a Support System – in Person and in Meditation

Identify and associate with people who are following healthy routines – eating, exercise, stress management, or lifestyle – and with ethical values you respect. You unconsciously become like the people with whom you associate and identify. While it is important to have a network of support of people you see or talk to on a regular basis, it is possible to gain strength from those you only know of, even role models of people long dead. Put their picture on your fridge, or desktop. In meditation, link your mind with the universal consciousness that allows/allowed them to be healtlhy and strong, and live in a way you admire and respect.

Copyright by Roxanne Louise. However, this article may be shared in free online sources only if this copyright notice and link to and  are included with the content.

Strategies to Stop Smoking

overhead-view-of-glass-ashtray-full-of-cigarette-stubs_53990446  citation:

To succeed at anything, you need a plan and consistent action.

In any endeavor, a good strategy makes the difference between success and failure. Smoking cessation is no different. Yet, all too often someone wanting to quit neglects to think about or make one, and then gives up at the slightest difficulty when trying to stop. Why do they give up?

  • First, smoking is a coping device for a wide variety of things.

Bored? Smoke. Upset, irritated, angry? Smoke. Slightly nervous in social settings? Smoke. Bonding with friends who smoke? Alone, lonely, awkward, waiting for someone/something, just passing the time? Smoke. Smokers therefore need to find constructive ways to deal with all of the situations that smoking was used to handle.

  • Second, stress is the major cause of relapse. 

So it is best to learn new, additional stress management tools and practice them daily (even multiple times daily as needed) while quitting.

  • Third, smokers tend to forget their inner strengths and stick-to-it-ness that allowed them to succeed in other endeavors, and have unrealistic ideas of what succeeding in staying off cigarettes will take . 

It is important, therefore, to recall your previous achievements. Remind yourself what you did to accomplish other things that were worth doing. If you could do that, you can stop smoking too.

Anything worth doing, including things you have already accomplished, take applied effort over time.

For example, no one gave you a diploma because you signed up for school, or just because you may have been cute or a nice person. You had to earn your degree by attending class on a regular basis, writing your term papers, studying for and passing your exams. To get a paycheck you also had to earn it–showing up to work on time, learning the job and then completing whatever needed to be done every day. Same thing with raising a child. No infant survives to reach adulthood without someone feeding, washing, clothing, housing, training that child every day, year after year.

Remember what you already did that enabled you to accomplish anything important.

Then apply that same determination and application now to be and remain a fresh-air breather. After all, there is no way for you to really enjoy and get the most out of life without your health and abundant energy. You can protect your health, vitality and lifespan becoming and remaining a nonsmoker right now. Isn’t that reason enough to make it a priority and apply yourself?

Learning and practicing new stress management tools is an essential part of long-term success.

One of two reasons that a smoker will revert back to smoking is as a coping device for stress. So I teach all of my smoking cessation clients self-hypnosis, the Emotional Freedom Technique, Walking Mantras, Glass of Water Technique, and NLP techniques such as anchoring successes, connecting cigarettes/tobacco to something disgusting, and hypnotic interventions such as Parts Therapy. Put together, they make a powerful program. If interested, you can check out my stop smoking books listed at the end and also here

It is only by facing a challenge that a person finds his internal strength and personal power. Becoming a non-smoker will teach you that you have the power to do anything you make up your mind to do.

Remember that if any goal is or ever has been important to you, whether learning to read and write, ride a bicycle, drive a car, use the computer, get a degree, you applied yourself and practiced. That’s no different than learning how to be and remain a nonsmoker now.

Smoking is both a habit and an addiction.

The addictive substance, nicotine, is out of the body within the first week of no longer smoking. However, the psychological addiction to dopamine, the ‘feel good’ neurotransmitter in your brain released by nicotine, is a hook to relapse unless you find other ways to get those good feelings, for example, through exercise and fun activities like sports, singing, dancing, laughter, love and lovemaking, and recognition of achievements.

Make mini goals that are believable.

Dopamine is also a vital part of motivation as well, and people with low levels of dopamine are less likely to work for things. So setting up mini goals whether related to smoking cessation or not, and then acknowledging each achievement releases dopamine into your system.

Some people who quit smoking on their own have succeeded by cutting back by 5 cigarettes per week until they just stop. Because my clients get the super bonus of hypnosis, I have them program themselves before their first appointment, and then quit at their first session. You can focus on the short term goal of getting through the morning as a nonsmoker, then getting through to dinner, then to bedtime, then to morning, etc.

Eat foods rich in tyrosine and are antioxidants. 

Almonds, avocados, bananas, fish, dairy, meat, etc.) enable your body to make dopamine. Antioxidants help reduce free radical damage to the brain that produce dopamine. You can get antioxidants through Beta-carotene and carotenoids from greens, orange fruits and vegetables, asparagus, broccoli and beets, Vitamin C (citrus fruit, strawberries, peppers, cauliflower, brussels sprouts, and Vitamin E from nuts, sunflower seeds, greens, broccoli and carrots. Adequate sleep is also very important.

Breaking the habit

As to the habit portion of smoking, the automatic hand to mouth reflexes, for example, and the associations with when, where, how you smoked, it takes about 21 times of doing it as a nonsmoker before it no longer seems awkward. For example, if you used to smoke first thing in the morning, now practice waking up and having a glass of water instead, or jump right into the shower for 21 days. If you used to smoke in the car, now practice driving 21 times as a nonsmoker. Within the month, doing the same things without a cigarette will seem more natural.

Do things differently.

It helps to do the things you will continue to do now without the smoke in a different way. For example, sit in a different chair or location from where you used to smoke. Have your coffee with both hands around your cup. Place a glass of water where the ashtray once was. Avoid your usual smoking places if possible. Change your routine.

Know why you are dumping the habit, and write it down. What do you want MORE than a smoke?

  • What do you hate about smoking?
  • Do you want to get rid of or to avoid something by quitting?

Is it the smell on yourself, your clothes, home and car, the taste in your mouth, your kiss? Is it the ashes, the holes in the carpet, getting burnt? How about the money you could better spend on something really fun or satisfying? Have you ever figured out what smoking costs you in terms of the tobacco plus dry cleaning plus sick days, doctor visits, etc.? How about the loss of energy, health problems or fear of them? Do you hate being controlled, having to go out in the snow, rain, cold or heat just to buy a pack, and worrying about running out, having to carry them everywhere? Do you feel like a social outcast or that people are judging you? Do you hate knowing that you will die 4-8 years sooner and suffer more illnesses (some really painful and totally unnecessary) all because of smoking?

The truth is that smokers spend good money to feel bad!

And that’s just plain stupid like a lot of things you probably did when you were young and didn’t know any better. Smoking is totally inappropriate for someone who loves and respects himself (or wants to), who considers himself as intelligent, as doing what is best for him which includes taking reasonable care of their health, and who wants to live life with joy and energy. So I am not surprised you want to get rid of the filty, dirty habit once and for all. It’s one of the most important things you can do for yourself, and one which will teach you that you can have the power, the inner resources to succeed at other things as well.

  • What positive things do you hope to gain by becoming a nonsmoker?

Write your reasons down and post them where you can see them. Carry around a card or little notepad with “Why I am doing this” or “Why I am becoming a nonsmoker now.” Read and reread it multiple times daily to stay focused, not just to psychologically gear you up to quit, or sustain you through the initial days, but anytime that a craving hits, six months or ten years from now. There will be pop quizzes along the way to see if you really mean to remain a nonsmoker. The card in your wallet can keep you on track.

  • I choose to become a nonsmoker because___________.

Did you ever have to break up with someone who might have been gorgeous, but was ‘bad news’, someone who treated you as an after thought, or even rotten? When you are breaking up a relationship, it is not the time to think about what you liked about your lover or how sexually compelling they might have been. You need to have your wits about you and remember why the relationship was wrong for you, what you hated about it, and know that you are breaking up because you deserve better.

Dwell on your reasons to quit.

Remind yourself that I deserve better health, I deserve abundant energy, I deserve to feel good in my own skin,” and go out after it by becoming a fresh-air breather NOW!

Cigarettes are poison.

There are over 4000 chemicals including arsenic, formaldehyde, cesium, nicotine, nicotinic acid, strontium, titanium, pesticides and much more. So it is no surprise that smoking hurts people and can, or already has, hurt you. For a start, smoking decreases your life span by about 8 years, and 4 years if you are a very light smoker, but increases your illness potential multiple times for the duration of that life.

Cigarettes are not your friend.

 They stink, they drain your energy, make you huff and puff going up a silly staircase or smallest hill. They set up fear that you might have cancer every time you cough. They run your life, preoccupy your mind, and make you worry that you will run out of them. And if you do run out of them, you have to go out in the rain, the snow, the cold, the heat, when you are tired, when you would rather be doing something else or nothing at all, all just to buy another pack! That is stupid! And why do you do that? It is because you enjoy them so much? Probably not so much! You buy them because you don’t like the uncomfortable feeling from not smoking and you don’t trust that you have the power to quit! However, you are now about to find out that you have the power to get them out of your life for good right now!

Becoming a nonsmoker is a decision, not something that you “try.” 

Once you make the decision to stop, and then a thought comes up to smoke, remind yourself

“It’s important that I honor this commitment to myself to be and remain a nonsmoker.”

“This is the most important thing I can do for my health right now, and I am so proud of myself.” 

Eliminate internal conflict with both the Emotional Freedom Technique and refocusing on why you are doing this.

What will sabotage you for sure is thinking “I want to smoke, but I shouldn’t.”  It is fine to admit any cravings, frustration, difficulties and tap them away. Look up the Emotional Freedom Technique online. There are lots of free training. Once you watch the procedure, you can say:

  • Even though I want a cigarette right now, I deeply love and accept myself.
  • Even though I want a cigarette when I ___ (eat/ drive/ talk on the phone/ after dinner/ get stressed or bored/ wake up, etc.), I deeply love and accept myself.
  • Even though a part of me doesn’t want to quit, I deeply love and accept myself. 

Identify yourself as a nonsmoker, and with people who have successfully quit.

You will automatically behave as if it is true. Remember, if other people could do this, why not you? Make your dominant thought one of being a nonsmoker.

Visualize succeeding. See it, feel it, make it real!

Vividly imagine going through your daily routines as a nonsmoker. Imagine going out into the future 30 days, 60, 90, holidays right up to a year from now all as a nonsmoker. Imagine people noticing how good you look, how you have more energy, better health, and you saying, “yes, I am a nonsmoker now and that has made all the difference!”

Breathe deeply.

Three slow, deep breaths anytime you need to relax, relieve stress, or clear away counterproductive thoughts or emotions. Exercise is even better, but not always possible in the moment, but deep breathing always is.

Practice thought stopping and switching.

Watch your thoughts. Thoughts precede emotion, and emotion precede action. Deliberately think thoughts that cause you to feel good and you will instant improve your brain chemistry. The moment you catch yourself with a sabotaging thought, switch to one that helps you.

If at any time you should you think “this is too hard”, focus on one of these:

  • “sooner or later I figure it out.”
  • “if ___ could do it, so can I.” 
  • “this is the most important thing I can do for my health, and I am so proud of myself.” 
  • there’s a part of me that knows how to do this with grace and ease, and that part is helping me now.”

And finally, don’t get cocky. Never have just one.

Having even one cigarette, even a puff will trigger the chemical addiction, and you will have to redo everything all over again. Don’t do it to yourself.

There are so many more tips I have of how you can help yourself become and remain a fresh-air breather. For further information and quitting on your own without outside help, have a look at my book Yes, You Can Stop Smokingd71e288f2c7b306368f39241f67a9898 It includes a hypnotic script, vital stress management tools including self-hypnosis and Emotional Freedom Technique instructions, and much more. 181 pages Just $29.95 to possibly save your life.

If you are a hypnotherapist, you can learn my entire professional program through my 194 page manual, Everything You Need to Help Others Quit! 53de181d7dc6790402835c35794fcc95