PUBLISHED: Releasing Anger without Killing Anyone!

Just Published!!!!

beartoons-anger    Cartoon citation:

Releasing Anger Without Killing Anyone!

by Roxanne Louise

An entire Anger Management Course!

Teach right out of the book!

Use it to help yourself! Use it to help others! 

A jam-packed guide on how to:

√ Turn anger into a blessing! 

√ Shift anger into constructive action! 

√ Use your challenges to improve yourself, your business, relationships & your life!

    • Understand the underlying dynamics! 
    • Change how you look at things so that they don’t bother you nearly as much! 
    • Make your enemies & problems help you! 
    • Harness anger as motivation to heal & make much needed change! 
    • Communicate more effectively! 
    • Fight clean! 
    • Stop conversations from spiraling downwards! 
    • Notice negative patterns & screw them up! 
    • Take effective action without the baggage!
    • Enjoy your life despite the crap!

Jam Packed Tips, Strategies, Techniques & Visualizations! 

Turn Everything Into a Blessing!

154 pages. Just $29.95 plus $5 shipping.  Order here:

In addition to covering this information with clients over the years, I have taught this material at numerous hypnosis conventions including workshops at the National Guild of Hypnotists Convention and the National Association of Transpersonal Hypnotherapists.


Surfing as a Metaphor for Life


Photo citation: Frederic Maitre,

What you can learn from surfers

I was watching my son out riding his paddle board in the ocean and getting back up after after wipeout. It reminded me of the many times that I have watched him surf in many places over the years.  And I was thinking of how surfing can remind us of so many important things for living our lives.

  • Get in the water.

First of all, to surf, you have to get into the water–all the way in. That’s the only way you can do it. And, yes, it’s cold and uncomfortable. Keep moving forward and getting deeper in anyway.

  • Work with the natural energy.

There is no use fighting the waves. This is the unstoppable raw force of nature. You either ride them into the shore or sideways inside the curve. But in any case, you are working with the energy, not against the natural momentum.

  • Stay fully present and pay attention. 

The ocean demands respect. You respect it by acknowledging it’s raw power, and you pay attention every moment or you get washed out or into a precarious situation that you can’t handle. You are being forced to be fully present. This is one of it’s gifts.

  • Know your limits.

The ocean can be thrilling or you can drown. Watching not only the size of the waves as they approach but the tide, the direction of the current towards dangerous rocks or other obstacles, and your fatigue level can signal when you should get out for that day or move elsewhere.

  • Position yourself.

Surfers paddle over the small crests and low breakwater to get to where the action is. They get into position for the right opportunities.

  • Seize the opportunity and catch the waves.

If you watch surfers, they are out there just waiting for the moment when the right wave is approaching. Too big and they dive below the surface. Too small, and they let it pass by. But when just the right size comes towards them that they can handle, they quickly adjust themselves to ride it as far as it will take them.

  • Find the sweet spot and flow.

Once you are riding the wave, following the natural curve and flow of the water, you feel the exhilaration of being in the flow–that magical space where the natural energy carries you easily, effortlessly to your destination. Surfers know enough when to stop paddling and just enjoy the ride.

  • Keep in shape with practice.

While looking for the best waves, surfers may ride smaller ones just to keep in practice while waiting for something better.

  • Do it again and again.

And then they do it again and over again. Consistent practice of positioning themselves, paying attention, catching the waves and riding them over and over.

  • Sometimes  you get a good one, sometimes you don’t.

Whether the surfing is good or not, surfers just know that they are keeping in shape and building their skills for when the right opportunity comes along.

  • Keep your balance

Surfing requires that you are making adjustments all the time to stay on top.

  • Get back up.

Surfers know that they are going to be knocked down into the water. They experience many wipe outs. But regardless, they climb back on board. 

  • Remember to attach your lifeline

Surfers rely on their boards to get them back to shore. So they attach a line to themselves so that even if washed out, they can recover and get back to shore safely for another try.

Copyright by Roxanne Louise. However, this article may be shared in other free online sources only if this copyright notice and link to and  are included with the content.

FOR MORE INFORMATION: see our main website: or call 434-263-4337

The Value of DEAD- lines

Two people I know just died last week. Three notable colleagues, two of whom were mentors, died in the past few months. Many I know are facing health challenges.

There comes a point in our lives where we have a wake-up call. It might be the death of a friend, classmate, or someone else our age. We could be facing a serious illness or fear of one, or have a close call with an accident–some visceral reminder of our own mortality. And if we have important things undone, we are reminded to get about doing it. If there is still music in us, we had better make it now.

Awareness of limited time is your ally!

While no one knows how long we will live or how it will end, at some point, we ask ourself what do we want to do in the time we have left.

What is going to be our legacy?

What have we done, or learnt or experienced that will have made it all worthwhile?

What can we yet do, learn or experience that will give us meaning and joy?

What do we need to heal that will allow us to pass in peace?

What’s on our bucket list?

I was listening to Stephen Cope, psychotherapist and senior yoga teacher at Kripalu, talk about finding your true purpose and leading a passionate life. Cope works with the teachings of the Bhagavad Gita and dharma. Dharma is about finding your true calling and purpose in life found by discovering your unique gifts. 

Cope says that your dharma or calling gives you meaning, purpose and passion thereby ‘saving’ your life. But it damns you if you do not answer the call. I know this well as a former classical singer.

Gifts are a blessing if you use them, and a curse if you do not.

They are meant to be used, whether full time or avocationally, whether at one phase life or another. But they gnaw on your spirit until you do something about it. 

Following your calling has a sense of ‘rightness’ about it. It allows a feeling of flow, a connection with something deep inside of you, a feeling of fully being your authentic self. Not doing so, whether out of fear or self-doubt, or whether you are prevented from doing so by outside force, nags unceasingly at you.

Finding your authentic self

A calling is not necessarily just what you are good at, but what feeds your spirit. It is what makes you feel alive, in the flow. It gives you purpose.

Dharma can change in different stages of your life. And while it might be sensible or even necessary to stick with something because you have amassed some success, seniority, pension and continuing along those lines is easy, you do so at a price of growth, satisfying challenge, and engagement with your own life force.

There have been people throughout history that have in their spare time, followed their passion after-hours. For example, Charles Ives, the first American composer of international stature, worked in the insurance field during the day. 

Some were already successful in one field and switched temporarily or permanently to another. For example, Sir Isaac Newton worked in the British Royal Mint, reorganizing England’s coinage, and then Scotland’s. Charles Lindbergh stopped flying for a while to do successful biomedical research, and developed a perfusion device that kept organs alive and healthy without infection thereby allowing certain surgeries to be done. “Big Bill” Lear of aircraft building fame later invented eight-track tapes and co-designed the first car radio.

What do you feel is yours to do?

Cope says that once you discover your calling, you need to go all in. This will mean a clear commitment, and cutting off of other options. Burning the boats for your escape when things get tough takes great courage. But it will also force you to go forward, and cut out distractions in your day  to day life. This focus is a requirement for your path to flourish.

But rather than being focused on end results, Cope says to turn it over to something bigger than yourself. Let go of small egoic self, get out of the way and let God within shine through you.

Sometimes nature can provide a model. Whether dandelion or rose, gardenia or black eye Susan, flowers know enough to be their authentic self, and hold their head up high, and bloom. I think we can learn from them.

Copyright by Roxanne Louise. However, this article may be shared in other free online sources only if this copyright notice and link to and  are included with the content.

FOR MORE INFORMATION: see our main website: or call 434-263-4337