Using Humor to Defuse Anger!

Unless you’re a psychopath, you are not going to kill somebody while you are laughing. And when you are done laughing, the original anger that made you want to kill, will have almost certainly lessened or be gone. Humor lessens tension so that better communication or constructive action can take place. So use humor to defuse!

Years ago when my son was a teenager and giving me a lot of ‘lip’, we had lots of arguments. I was completely frustrated, and constantly upset by his defiance. On this particular occasion, we (my husband, son and myself) were at the dinner table when my son started in. I was just about to serve the mashed potatoes. The big spoon with a heaping amount of vegetable was in my hand ready to dish out. Something in me clicked, and I pulled back on the spoon and catapulted it’s contents into my son’t face. My son responded by dipping his bare hand into the mashed potatoes and dumping them on top of my head. With that, my husband leapt up yelling “food fight!” And the fight was ON! All three of us threw mashed potatoes, pillows, anything non-breakable and non dangerous at one another, running all over the house.

IT WAS WONDERFUL!

It turned out to be the best thing we did because it totally cleared the air of tension between my son and I that had been building since I remarried. While we had to redecorate the hallway afterwards, that was no loss as the wallpaper was 50 years old and needed to go. My coat, which someone had used as a shield, also suffered, and had to go to the dry cleaner. But otherwise, everything else was fine.

At a later time, when my marriage was ending, I was extremely depressed (depression is the flip side of anger).  At the office and unable to concentrate on doing any work, I wandered next door to a neighbor’s office. Finding him alone, I asked him to tell me a joke because I badly needed to laugh. He remembered one, we both laughed, and I proceeded to someone else’s office. “I have a joke for you,” I said. I repeated the joke, laughed again, and asked him to tell me one. With this, I continued down the hall, repeating each of the jokes I learned and asking for more. Each time I told or heard one, I laughed and they laughed. This went on for weeks. The entire floor became engaged in joke telling and it boosted the spirits for us all.

Humor can be a healthy way of coping with strong emotions such as anger, depression, frustration and emotional pain. It allows you to keep your sanity so you can survive whatever is going on. The laughter brings oxygen to your brain so that you can think more clearly. As tension is released, it allows you to become more rational and make better decisions and to take constructive action.

At an earlier time and another divorce, my son (then in grade school) and I both had a lot of anger at his step-father, who had not only been emotionally abusive to us both, but had been physically rough with my son. My son truly hated this man and was prepared to hurt him if he came back into the house. So I had him play mental games with me of what practical jokes we could play on this man – things that would be an affront to his dignity, but not physically hurt him in any way.

For example, we would imagine giant birds or animals flying overhead and pooping on him, or sending dog too-doo to him in the mail, etc. We would imagine him as animal/bird/critter, and come up with insulting but funny names to call him. These mental games helped him, and are similar to a Neural Linguistic Programming technique called ‘Carnival’. I have written several visualizations to turn anger into humor in Chapter 6 my self-hypnosis course book, Your Unlimited Potential (see link here).

When things are really tough, sometimes the only thing you can do is to laugh. And if you are able to laugh on a regular basis, you probably will not get so angry or as often. So look for the funny side of things!

0  I will be presenting a seminar on Using Humor to Defuse Anger in Your Practice at the upcoming National Association of Transpersonal Hypnotherapists Conference occurring November 3-8 in Virginia Beach, Virginia. And I also will be giving a full-day workshop on Releasing Anger Without Killing Anyone on Wednesday, 11/8. See NATH.world for information.

Upcoming Workshop 11/3 & Book

20170516_AccessingMoreCover

For the past few years, I have been teaching others how to tap into the wisdom within both to solve problems with ease and grace, and to relieve stress in minutes. I have put it into a greatly expanded 117 page manual entitled Accessing More — Tapping into the Eternal, Unlimited Self with the Infinite Intelligence Process. This is a four pronged modality that you can learn out of the book. It was designed for you to refer back to for help on a daily basis. 

Upcoming Workshop in Virginia Beach, 11/3

You can also come to the workshop at the upcoming National Association of Transpersonal Hypnotherapists National Conference being held in Virginia Beach, this November 3-8. The class is scheduled for Friday, November 3 from 8 AM – Noon. Call 855-772-0459 or register at http://www.NATH.world.

Accessing More — Tapping into the Eternal, Unlimited Self with the Infinite Intelligence Process is available at https://www.roxannelouise.com/accessing-more-tapping.html for just $24.95 plus shipping.

What is this inner wisdom and how can you access it?

    • Have you ever had the experience of tapping into something More–more than you are aware of knowing or being able to do consciously? 
    • And has this More allowed you the ability to accomplish the difficult with ease and grace? 
    • Did it allow you to succeed even though success was considered unlikely or even impossible? 
    • Was it there just when you needed it? 
    • And did it solve a problem in the most perfect way?

Certainly, I have on multiple occasions, and I have heard the stories of others as well. Whether it is suddenly being able to solve problems that had previously defied solution, having creative breakthroughs, superhuman strength to save the life of another, or responding protocol perfect to a never before encountered emergency, people have amazed themselves and others when they have spontaneously accessed this greater wisdom, intelligence, strength, ability or knowledge. Sometimes it has come as a result of a necessity or out of nowhere during an emergency, and sometimes it has come in quiet moments after working on it for a prolonged period of time through normal conscious means and then letting their mind relax.

For example, I was awakened one morning with noise coming from my master bathroom. I found my five cats surrounding a copperhead snake that had gotten up into the ventilation system from the crawl space and pushed up the floor grate to get into the room. The snake was coiled up ready to attack, and kept rotating its head to watch each of the cats. What could I do? I had to protect my cats, prevent the snake from getting back down the floor grate and having access from the ventilation system to other parts of the house. I had to be sure to get it, dead or alive, completely out of the house without myself or my animals getting hurt. The way I responded turned out to be protocol perfect even though I had never been trained. How did I just naturally do everything right?

Another time, I found myself caught in a rip tide and rapidly pulled out to sea. I tried swimming to shore, but it didn’t work and I quickly got exhausted. I tried yelling and waving my arms for help, but those on shore didn’t notice and couldn’t hear me over the surf. I was getting wiped out with the waves and getting water in my mouth. Again, it seemed that I tapped into that something More to stay calm and focused on what I could do to stay alive.

Like a cat with nine lives, I have had many experiences starting from childhood that could have been dangerous, even fatal. I have also had many overwhelming responsibilities or pressures through which I sailed calmly. I have accomplished some amazing things with ease. You probably have done or know others who have done the same. Just google feats of superhuman strength and you will find many real life examples.

While necessity does motivate us to look deeper for ideas and strength, it certainly does not guarantee being able to do so as so many people blank or numb out, freeze or just panic. The questions for all of us are:

• How do we tap into that greater knowing, wisdom, ability or resources without it having to be an emergency, life or death situation? 

• How can we tune into whatever it is that allows us to handle life with greater ease and grace on a regular basis? 

• How can we routinely tune in and save ourselves a lot of time and energy, worry and frustration, fear and anger on or about upsetting events as well as ordinary everyday things–our job, relationships, daily life and responsibilities?

Some people may automatically jump to religious causation for all beneficial outcomes, and I do not dispute that miracles may occur. But it is my personal opinion that believing that all help comes from outside of us can actually limit the natural flow and development of what may inherently be an inside but undeveloped part of us. Instead, if we can consider that we are MORE than we think we are, we may be able to connect to the More that we truly are. I do not know or need to know where the demarcation ends of what is me at my highest and best and what goes beyond ‘me’.

Accessing More starts by adopting the open minded attitude that it is possible–that you are able to harness greater resources, wisdom and ability that go beyond the limitations of the ego and conscious mind, beyond the subconscious, to the spiritual dimension of the self that is further linked to an even greater consciousness. Start with a positive attitude and set an intention to do so.

Accessing More of both what is within and without is done below the level of conscious awareness. Simply quiet your mind, and go inside to the peaceful part of you, affirm your intention, and allow that inner something to do its work. This approach circumvents the ego, the mind games, circuitous thinking, internal and external blocks, and inhibiting energies that have prevented previous solution to the issue of concern. The process works to solve practical problems, relieve stress, and heal from long-standing issues–even sometimes those that have previously defied resolution. All aspects of your life can be addressed–mental, emotional, relationship, physical, financial, business, and spiritual.

This process can be used anytime, anyplace as a self-help tool by the ordinary person to help himself in real life situations. It can also be used for meditation, constructive self-programming, and in conjunction with other modalities. But hypnotherapists, dowsers, teachers, counselors, life coaches, energy healers, mental health practitioners, and others can also employ it as a full-fledged therapy. It draws upon the principles and practices of hypnosis, Neural Linguistic Programming, dowsing, meditation, prayer and many energy healing methods.

So what exactly is this More?

While it includes your subconscious mind that regulates all of your body functions, automatic behavior, physical, mental and emotional habits, directives and injunctions, beliefs, judgments, and memory, it goes beyond that. I believe that this More is primarily the eternal, infinite intelligence within you that is intrinsically linked to the ultimate consciousness behind all that is. Using this system increases your awareness that you are More than your ego, More than your body and local mind, and More than the individual, spiritual self that people call the soul, to something beyond.

Traditional religious circles say that this More is God, and exists totally outside and apart from the self, and is reachable through prayer, petition, ritual or sacrifice. Unfortunately, all too often prayers beg, whine, or plead in fear without really believing that help will come, or make things worse by focusing on the negative. Consequently, such practices can nullify such help.

Labeling or identifying this More is not important to access the benefits.

In fact, it can get you stuck and mired in mankind’s perpetual argument over philosophical and religious discussions that are, in the final analysis, unprovable and come down to a matter of beliefs. Whether right or wrong, true or false, your beliefs and attitude do make things easier or harder. So adopting a helpful attitude, a curious mind that holds a window of possibility when you desire to solve a problem or achieve a goal is crucial to your success.  

The Infinite Intelligence Process is one way to tap into what I call More.

It helps you to adopt an attitude that will make things easier and flow more readily. It makes a big difference in processing overload and releasing stress, and it does so in a very simple way that you can do anytime, any place. Let me show you how you can quickly and easily tap into that incredible wisdom and resources within you on a regular basis! Consider buying the book and come if at all possible to the workshop. 

Hypnosis Conference Starts 11/4

I am off to teach at the NATIONAL ASSOCIATION OF TRANSPERSONAL THERAPISTS to be held at the Barclay Hotel, Virginia Beach, Virginia! The conference starts Friday, November 4 and goes through Sunday, November 6 with additional classes continuing through next week.  I am teaching:
  • “Hypnosis for Cancer and Other Diseases: Make a Powerful Healing Difference!”
  • “Teaching Self-Help Classesthe #1 way to build and expand your business!”
  • “Hypnosis for Soul Healing”
  • “Hypnosis for Personal Empowerment”

For more information, see the brochure here or contact the National Association of Transpersonal Hypnotherapists or call 800-296-6463.

Teaching at NATH Conference

The National Association of Transpersonal Hypnotherapy Conference takes place at the Barclay Hotel in Virginia Beach, Virginia this November 4-10. Once again as I have done since their inception in 1995, I will be presenting. Call to register, 800-296-6463. Here are the topics:

“Hypnosis for Cancer and Other Diseases: Make a Powerful Healing Difference!”

Friday, November 4 from 9-11:30 AM. 

Most major diseases such as cancer, diabetes, heart disease, and a host of chronic diseases come about after a long period of stress, bad habits, unbalanced lifestyle, overall abuse or neglect of one’s health or needs—all things not addressed by allopathic medicine. Regardless of undergoing any needed surgery, medical treatment or drug protocol, longterm healing also requires addressing what weakened or overloaded the system in the first place.

Dealing with stress, both current stressors and past unresolved emotional trauma, is always indicated because it is stress that robs vital energy needed for the body’s defense and healthy cell regeneration and repair. Here, Hypnotherapists are the experts and can be a vital part of a well rounded treatment protocol.

During this workshop, you will learn multiple ways of becoming a powerful asset in your client’s healing journey. Expect to leave this workshop much better prepared to help not just cancer patients but those of many other serious health issues as well.

“Hypnosis for Soul Healing”

Saturday, November 5 at 8 AM

Refresh mind, body and spirit with a morning group hypnosis session designed to assist you to tap into your eternal, unlimited self. Whether desiring healing, objectivity, a paradigm shift, internal guidance, Roxanne will guide you into that still, quiet place that allows you to access the More of you than you are consciously aware, More than your incarnational self, to the More some people call your soul, High Self and perhaps beyond to the Source. This loosely guided hypnosis session will allow time for you to process at your own pace and receive the help you personally desire.

“Hypnosis for Personal Empowerment”

Sunday, November 6 at 8 AM

Start your day with a  group hypnosis session designed to assist you to tap into inner resources to get ideas, make creative breakthroughs, or just a clear away psychic debris and stress so that you can better fulfill your dreams. This loosely guided hypnosis session will allow time for you to process at your own pace and receive the help you personally desire.

“Teaching Self-Help Classesthe #1 way to build and expand your business!”

Saturday, November 5 at 2:45 PM

This is the easiest way for new hypnotherapists to internalize information, build a business and perfect their skills. It is also a great way for well established hypnotherapists to expand their client and referral base. Some people will never sign up for a private session, but will take a class, especially if it is easily affordable. And they will, if they like and trust you, refer others to you who will sign up for private sessions. It then becomes free marketing that can go on for years!

I started out teaching Self Hypnosis classes, and later added Healing Anger without Killing Anyone, Tap Your Troubles Away with the Emotional Freedom Technique, Finding True Love, Understanding Illness from the Stress Connection, It’s Not What You’re Eating—It’s What’s Eating You!, Preparing for Childbirth, Stop Smoking, Introduction to Pain Management, and more. You could do something on sports, test taking and study skills, public speaking. The possible topics are endless. It is fun and generates phenomenal energy into your practice. 

Come learn a framework for multiple classes. Whether done live or online, whether in your office, adult center, or community college, they will help you receive customer recognition, and become the expert in your community. Here is a class that will put money into your pocket!

For more information, see the National Association of Transpersonal Hypnotherapists or call 800-296-6463. .