Life Provides Three Kinds of Teachers

02 Oct 2015 Leave a comment

by unlimitedpotentialhealingcenter in Hypnosis, self help Tags: , , , , , , ,

Somewhere I heard that a tribe of the American Indians consider that we can have three kinds of teachers.

The Positive Teacher

The first kind of teacher is one that teaches us by their positive example. Their words and life demonstrate in a most wonderful way how to be, how to live, and what is really important. They provide answers to the big questions of life. Not only is their teaching true and helpful, but they walk their talk. You are truly blessed if you have this shining example in your life as a guide.

However, the downside is that their teaching can be taken on faith without examination. Their lessons may be learned by rote. With unquestioning acceptance of what is said, their student may not learn how to learn, how to find the answers to what was not provided, how to discern and evaluate information. They may not learn how to handle or adapt to changing times or situations not encountered by their teacher. There is also a potential danger of remaining dependent on the teacher instead of growing in maturity and going beyond to develop a strong connection to the Source of all wisdom and truth on their own.

If you are accustomed to simply accepting what you are told and later meet an imperfect teacher, or imperfect followers of the perfect teacher, or if your teacher who had previously been a shining example gets caught up in ego and deviates from the path, you may not have developed your power of discernment to prevent you from also being led astray. Or you may chuck the whole teaching, throwing out what was good and valuable as well as what was not.

Another possibility is that although the teacher of the positive example found answers that were right for their own life and faithfully reported them to you, what was right for them may not be right for you or right at this point in time. You still have to process what you are being taught and told through the still small voice within you.

The Negative Teacher

The second type of teacher is someone who teaches you how to be and how to live by providing a strong example of how not to be or how not to live. Those who present the negative path are also very powerful teachers and can push you to self-reliance. By alienating you, they have freed you from dependency and having to conform to their ideas in order to please them. In so doing, you may learn to listen to your own heart and set a better course for yourself.

For example, if a parent abandons his children, you, as one of those children, may make a commitment to never abandon your own children because you experienced first hand the pain of that experience. As a result, your own children are blessed with the security that you will never leave them. If you had been around someone who taunted, humiliated, or verbally degraded you, you may learn to always think before you speak and to respect the feelings of others. This makes you nicer to be around. However, just because you may be gifted with a painful experience that has the potential to teach you much, 

learning is optional and never guaranteed.

The downside to the negative example is that you may simply judge and condemn this kind of teacher without ever finding the positive lesson. You may dwell in anger, bitterness or resentment, and may, unwittingly become like the very person you detest.

The Coyote Teacher

The third type is the coyote teacher that provides conflicting and confusing messages.  They give you both good and bad. They may say one thing but do another, or adhere to certain principles in one area while living/acting differently in another. Consequently, their message is confusing. They may give you only part of what you need and want to know. They sometimes tell you things that are true and helpful, but they may also tell you things that are false or hurtful, providing both positive and negative examples. The bottom line is that the Coyote forces you to dig down deep inside of yourself to find the answers for yourself. The gift that can potentially come out of this is for you sort through the mess to find your own truth and wisdom.

All types of teachers have value.

As you think of your parents, family members, school teachers, friends and associates, you may have witnessed examples all three kinds of teachers in your life already. The point is:

LEARN FROM ALL OF THEM!

The moment you learn, the moment you find the blessing, it takes the sting out of painful experiences and relationships, and removes confusion and discord. It also leads to greater understanding, acceptance and tolerance.

Ask yourself:

Is what I am hearing true? Is it always true? Can I still trust this message?

Is this example trustworthy, something that I want to emulate?

What can I learn from this person, this relationship, this interchange, positive or negative?

What is good that I admire and respect?

What is the positive opposite of what I am witnessing that I do not admire or respect, or dislike?

How can I use the words, message, example, positive or negative, of this person to be a better person myself?

What is the message others are getting from my life, my words and actions, my example?

Copyright by Roxanne Louise. However, this article may be shared in other free online sources only if this copyright notice and link to the following:

http://www.roxannelouise.com and http://unlimitedpotentialhealingcenter.com 

Derailing the Train to Negative Emotions

29 Sep 2015 Leave a comment

by unlimitedpotentialhealingcenter in Hypnosis, self help Tags: , , , ,

How to Recognize and Interrupt the Downward Spiral!

Emotions follow thought. As you notice your thoughts, you can predict their emotional outcome, and deliberately shift them to get to a more desirable emotional end result. Thought substitution is an easy way to do this because you cannot think of two things at once.

Thought substitution is NOT to deny your ‘negative’ thoughts or feelings. It is not being a Pollyanna or sticking your head in the sand. But it is a shift in focus to what you can do, to what you do want to create, and on the priorities of the moment. It is a shift to possibility thinking. And it can start off as simply holding a question or statement in mind.

WHY DO THIS?
1. Some, perhaps many, of your thoughts, beliefs, judgments as well as those of others can be unsubstantiated, unchallenged, and quite possibly untrue. So why stress yourself out if you don’t know for sure?

2. You may not really know your true limits. Your beliefs and the beliefs of others that you listen to can be stopping you before you really test those limits.

3. You may not be harnessing your inner resources without which you can never know what can or cannot be achieved.

4. The negative opinion of others (even that of experts) can be wrong. Remember that people thought that the earth was flat, and that you would drop off if you sailed too far. Remember also that it was thought that it was impossible to run a mile under 4 minutes. Then Roger Bannister came along.

5. Finally, you understand the precious quality of your mind to create reality, and choose not to squander it’s energy, but to work to create only a life, world that you want, instead of what you don’t want.

Copyright by Roxanne Louise. However, this article may be shared in other free online sources only if this copyright notice and link to http://www.roxannelouise.com and http://unlimitedpotentialhealingcenter.com  are included with the content.

Stopping the Downward Spiral of Emotions

18 Aug 2015 Leave a comment

by unlimitedpotentialhealingcenter in anger management, attitude, clearing non-beneficial energies, dealing with fear, Hypnosis, self help, stress management Tags: , , , ,

Emotions follow thought. Santa Cruz Vending 7:16 copy

As you notice your thoughts, you can predict their emotional outcome, and deliberately shift them to get to a more desirable emotional end result.

Thought substitution is an easy way to do this because you cannot think of two things at once.

This is never to deny your feelings or thoughts as denial leads to more problems. But rather it is to recognize that holding or dwelling on some thoughts or emotional states is counter productive and you pay a price for that. Making wise decisions so that you can take the most constructive, effective action requires being able to think clearly.

Emotional control starts with thought stopping and switching.

Furthermore, it is recognition that many thoughts, beliefs and judgments are based on faulty interpretations or world view that hinder you from overcoming challenges or achieving your goals. Such counterproductive thoughts or judgments may have been absorbed or adopted by you years ago without being examined consciously as an adult. Are they really accurate assessments of what is real or possible? Shift them as necessary.

Here are simple ways to shift

1. Shift to a question.

If the thought is “I can’t, I mustn’t, it’ll never work”. Change it to a question of the opposite: “what if I could, what if I can, what if it could work?” All will stimulate your thinking to look for solution, possibilities.

2. Shift emotion by decision.

If you have a bad experience, you could make a decision that it is going to work for your positive advantage even though you cannot possibly know if that will be the case. This decision will stimulate you to look for and possibly find constructive ways to turn that situation around.

“I turn this to my positive advantage.” or “I make this work for me.”

3: Affirm inner resources to solve problems.

If you are feeling stressed, you could affirm that there is greater wisdom, creativity and strength within you that knows how to solve problems and handle whatever you have to do. Then affirm that these inner resources can be harnessed to do so. The truth is that you cannot know the true limits of your inner resources so why not affirm that there is more ability within you? Why not think that you are capable of rising to the occasion and overcoming problems and achieving goals? This can have the immediate effect of calming you down and moving forward.

fullsizeoutput_2c I do this through what I call The Infinite Intelligence Process, which is fully explained in my book, Accessing More – Tapping Into the Eternal, Unlimited Self with the Infinite Intelligence Process. Below is a sample wording:

“There is a part of my being that knows how to handle this with grace and ease, and is doing so now,” or “there is a part of my being that can resolve this issue, and I am being guided to what I need to do and how to proceed,” or “there is a part of my being that knows who can help me with this, and I am being directed now.” 

4: Challenge negative authoriity figures.

If someone else says that you can’t do something, that it will never work, you can challenge their authority to know. In your mind, negate the value of their opinion. The truth is that when someone offers their opinion, even their educated opinion, it is only from what they have studied, what they have experienced, and does not include what they have not studied or experienced.

For example, medical doctors are experts in drugs and surgery, but not in nutrition, energy work or the healing power of prayer, stress management, forgiveness and loving relationships–all of which have a powerful ability to heal. Even within any given profession, the experts frequently disagree. This is why we are advised to seek a second or third medical opinion. Same thing goes for all other experts as well.

Before you accept the opinion of others, determine how knowledgable and experienced that opinion really is on the given topic. Within every profession there are those that find solutions to problems that their colleagues think are unsolvable. And outside of the profession there are those that sometimes come up with creative solutions that work. Why not let that creative problem solver be you?

“What does he know?”or “That’s what he thinks. He’s not an expert. He only knows ___, not ____.”

Or “if there was another way to go about this, what might that be? How can I look at this situation differently?”

Affirm that you are going to find a solution to any important issue.

“I find a way to make it work, I find the answers I need, etc.”

When you are clear about what you want, when you are determined to achieve your goal, you harness both internal resources and external assistance to do so. This gives success your best shot.

5: Focus on what you can do or what you need to do right now.

“What can I do right now to help this situation?”

Write a list and sort out priorities.

“What is the most important thing I need to focus upon?” “What is the first thing I need to do?”

6: Use affirmations and counter thoughts

Repeat any helpful suggestion or counter thought in your mind over and over to blot out the negative thoughts that prevent you from solving the problem.

7. Walking Mantras

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Walking Mantras are positive counter thoughts or affirmation in the form of a little jingle that you repeat rhymically to match to steady movements such a walking steps. I list a great many more in my self-hypnosis book, Your Unlimited Potential, along with an entire chapter on stress management, but here are some:

I find a way that works for me.

Sooner or later I figure it out. 

I learn and move on.

I get everything done on time.

8. Singing

After you have done what you can and your thoughts are still run-a-way negative, you can perhaps shift with singing a song, preferably a happy tune or inspirational one. Or just listen to music. Dancing also helps. They interrupt the pattern and instantly shift mood.

9. Jokes

Tell a joke or ask someone to tell you one, and then quickly retell to others. The humor will release internal tensions, and shift your mood quickly. I did this when I was going through a divorce. It helped a great deal. See another blog article, Using Humor to Defuse Anger! 

10. Exercise

Physical work or exercise gets tension out of the body. Because you also have to pay some attention to what you are doing, it takes away from negative ruminations.

11. Concentrate on anything else

Do anything that requires complete concentration.

FOR FURTHER INFORMATION:

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My book Releasing Anger Without Killing Anyone is full of visualizations, exercises, and information that helps you to transmute not just anger, but other disturbing emotions.

Copyright 2015 by Roxanne Louise. However, this article may be shared in other free online sources only if this copyright notice and link to http://www.roxannelouise.com and http://unlimitedpotentialhealingcenter.com  are included with the content.

FOR MORE INFORMATION: see our main website: http://www.roxannelouise.com or call 434-263-4337

Releasing Anger Without Killing Anyone!

17 Aug 2015 Leave a comment

by unlimitedpotentialhealingcenter in Hypnosis Tags: , ,

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I just returned from teaching at the National Guild of Hypnotists Convention in Marlboro, Massachusetts. It is the largest professional hypnosis conference in the world, and always a treat to attend, which I have done yearly since 1989. I have been a regular presenter there since 1992, and was honored by them in 2011 with a Lifetime Achievement Award, the Order of Braid, named after James Braid, the Scottish surgeon considered the father of Hypnotherapy!!! (See information on Braid, see https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Braid_(surgeon)

My topics this year were Releasing Anger Without Killing Anyone and a two-hour workshop on What to Do When Stress Is Over the Top! Both were well attended, and for good reason. Stress is a major problem with our fast-paced lifestyle.

28473e803e35e109e67ed86c222bfda6   In preparation for my presentations, I put together a 32 page booklet on Releasing Anger assembled from a lifetime of study and practical application on the subject. It is filled to the brim on

√ How to shift anger and improve yourself and your life at the same time,

√ How to harness anger so it actually works for you, and

√ How to make your adversaries help you!

This fluff-free manual was written both for you to help yourself, and to use to help others!

Here is some of the content:

Understanding the Underlying Dynamics

Changing how you look at things so that they don’t hurt nearly as much!

Making anger work for you!

Using your enemies and problems to actually help you!

Using anger as motivation for much needed healing and change!

Communicating more effectively!

Fighting clean!

Stopping conversations that are spiraling downwards!

Noticing negative patterns and screwing them up!

Nipping anger in the bud!

How to use journal writing effectively!

Taking effective action without the baggage!

Using positive counter thoughts, walking mantras and more!

Regaining balance and perspective!

Dealing with what is 

Incident Review Worksheet

At just $12.95 with $3 shipping or $5 priority, it is a real bargain as it gets right to the chase. No filler!

BONUS: As a bonus for your order, we will include a handout with directions for doing the Emotional Freedom Technique.

FOR MORE INFORMATION: see our main website: http://www.roxannelouise.com or call 434-263-4337

Stress Can Be Good For You?

07 Jul 2015 1 Comment

by unlimitedpotentialhealingcenter in Hypnosis Tags: , , , ,

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NOT TOO MUCH, NOT TOO LITTLE — Just Right!

The problem of stress reminds me of the story of Goldilocks and the Three Bears. A life that is good is free of extremes, neither too hard nor too soft, but just right.

Everyone knows that too many demands that go well beyond your ability to handle are bad, and lead to exhaustion, breakdown, and illness. But too little stress is also bad because it creates stagnation, boredom, depression, and mental/emotional/spiritual rot–yes, rot!

Growth requires a stimulus, a reason to get off the couch. Just as baby birds only learn to fly when pushed out of the nest, we too need a reason, someone or something to move us forward when inertia would have us just sit there and wait for someone to bring us dinner.

Biologist Bruce Lipton says that a biological organism is either in growth or protection. While in the protective mode, all healing, all cell regeneration, all work and creative enterprise come to halt. If this goes on long enough, you die. In other words, being healthy requires you to engage in life. Worry and fear closes you down and longterm leads to illness. In simple terms, grow or die.

Having something that challenges you and requires you to grow–to apply your abilities, develop skills, learn new things, use your creativity and inventiveness to solve problems, not only generates more brain cells, and feelings of accomplishment and pride, but can also lead to a livelihood, inventions, breakthroughs, and advance civilization.  Just the right amount of hunger is actually good for you.

Tony Robbins says that all motivation is carrot or stick. The carrot is desire. Because we desire it (the pretty girl or handsome guy, the dream house or vacation), we pursue it eagerly on our own. No one has to tell us to go after it. The stick is pressure usually from outside of us that forces us to move because otherwise we would not.

Frequently, this is caused by fear. For example, the house could be on fire, you might be afraid of losing your job, home or relationship. Carrot and stick can work together to get things done. Know why you are doing what you are doing in the positive sense — what are you moving towards–and the negative consequences of not doing so.

Dealing with stress, whether too much or too little, requires tools or strategies to set goals, create a plan to reach those goals, set priorities, have ways to stay focused and make decisions, and deal with the challenges and frustrations as they arise, which they always do.

Where do you start?

Decide where you are. Do you have too much stress or too little? In other words, are you overwhelmed, or are you feeling bored and empty?

If you are feeling too much stress, then you might start with deep breathing, exercise, and meditation. List what you have to do and set priorities. Identify what you need to do to solve any problems and enlist those who can help you. Then set timelines as a target.

Learn and practice any of the multiple stress management practices such as self-hypnosis, EFT (the Emotional Freedom Technique), Tapas Acupressure, the Emotion Code, Walking Mantras,  the Infinite Intelligence Process,  etc. Periodically, get away from the stress with humor, happy music, singing, dancing, fun, being with people that love and care about you, being out in nature or some other beautiful environment.

If you have too little stress, you need to get some dreams. What would be fun or interesting? What would make your spirit sing? What would give your life meaning and purpose? Make a bucket list and start somewhere. It doesn’t matter how old you are–any age will do. However, you do need to create a plan, a strategy, and follow all the guidelines of successful goal setting.

If you cannot think of what you would like, then volunteer, or just do something for someone else, for animals, for the environment or your community — just do some good somewhere, even random acts of kindness.

Whether the problem is too much or too little stress, having a buddy, coach or mentor to work along with you or to hold you accountable is a great way to stay on track.

FOOTNOTES:

Goldilocks is a fairy tale stemming from early 19th Century England. See https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Goldilocks_and_the_Three_Bears or for the short story see http://www.dltk-teach.com/rhymes/goldilocks_story.htm

Bruce Lipton, PhD. , stem cell biologist, and author of The Biology of Belief. See https://www.brucelipton.com

Tony Robbins is a motivational speaker, personal growth guru, life coach, and author. See https://www.tonyrobbins.com/

Walking Mantras is an invention of mine. It is a way of doing self-hypnosis with your eyes open. Repeat a short, rhythmical sentence or phrase while moving at a steady pace. Full self-hypnosis instruction is in Your Unlimited Potential, available through me and my website, http://www.roxannelouise.com.

The Infinite Intelligence Process is a three-pronged method of dealing with stress, problem solving, and manifesting. The full instruction is in my book, Accessing More.

Copyright by Roxanne Louise. However, this article may be shared in other free online sources only if this copyright notice and link to http://www.roxannelouise.com and http://unlimitedpotentialhealingcenter.com  are included with the content.

FOR MORE INFORMATION: see our main website: http://www.roxannelouise.com or call 434-263-4337

 

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